The Personal Testimony of Erica Pike
I was NOT born homosexual, although the lifestyle, which I lived for most of my life, led me to believe that I was. There is no scientific evidence that a person is born gay, nor is there any proof of a gay gene. However, there is a small group of individuals that would like to make us believe that this is true so that the homosexual lifestyle appears acceptable, when it’s not. It is an evil spirit that is sweeping our nation. In fact, the spirit of homosexuality attacked and attached itself to me when I was too young to have fought it off. Now, I cannot blame anyone in particular for that. But I hate that demon for what it made me and where it took me, all the while laughing at me in my misery. Thankfully, God had mercy on my soul!
As a child, I saw several different kinds of abuse, on both sides of my family, which included adultery, divorce, alcoholism, addiction and both physical and mental abuse. Furthermore, I was exposed to a couple of individuals in my family who were homosexual, along with those who were dabbling with it. Consequently, with these events in mind, this is where I will begin my testimony.
My innocence was stolen at a very young age, when I was molested for a season during my first girl crush, in the fourth grade. I then had my first actual girlfriend in seventh grade and was in the same type of relationships all the way through high school. My parents knew about my lifestyle and, although they never condoned it, they loved me because I was their child. I remember hearing my parents praying for me, but I was rebellious and didn’t care. At nineteen years old, I decided that this was the life for me and walked completely away from God. I wanted total control of my life, which included more friends, money, sex and alcohol.
I began club hopping and then moved the huge parties into my home. Alcohol made me forget everything I was doing, and I liked it. All through my 20’s I was searching, obsessing, wanting something. There was a void in my life that I couldn’t fill, but I sure was trying. In my mid-30’s, I finally met the person I was to spend the rest of my life with. I gave her a ring and told her these words, “I will never leave you for another woman, but I may someday for God.” Our relationship lasted almost 7 years.
In my late 30’s, I became sort of a “leader”, if you will, in the gay community. I made many acquaintances. My stage name, as a successful drag king, was very popular. I performed in many different clubs and cities for months at a time. I became further involved in the gay community by performing for AIDS benefits and raising money for those stricken with that horrible disease. Everyone knew who “Thumper” and “Dreyton” (our stage personalities) were, but no one really knew who I was as an individual, not even me. Some people wanted to be like me, others wanted my money or to “fit into my circuit,” but in reality most hated me.
Even though I had friends that placed me on a “pedestal”, I became emotionally damaged and physically drained at this point in my life. I hated who I was and how I treated people. I thought I was “King”, but on the inside I was dead. Where was I? Who had I become? I couldn’t feel, care or even love, but mostly through all of this I couldn’t hear God. My life was a wreck. I ended up hurting my family, my partner, my friends and most importantly, God. My life had become a lie. I had jumped from one relationship to another in search of sex, love, acceptance, control, and drugs. I hurt many people with my sexual desires. I would become so consumed with jealousy that I would want control and demanded it. I would become enraged and at times acted like an angry monster, lashing out and very abusive.
At one point, when I realized that I was so full of pride, anger, jealousy, hate and addiction, I asked myself, “How did I get here?” I knew in my mind that I had turned my back on God, that’s how! Where I walked, He followed. He kept calling and never left my side. He kept me safe in His arms, He kept stretching out His hand, but I wouldn’t reach out. All of those times that I felt His call, I was being lied to by the enemy of my soul. He kept saying, “You couldn’t endure the embarrassment, which would come from your friends, if they knew who you really wanted and needed to be.” That turmoil inside of me just wouldn’t end until I had had enough and decided to make a change.
I ran away from Indiana and that life and moved nineteen hundred miles to Temple, Texas. I didn’t know anyone and no one knew me. As fate would have it, I rented a small house from a little old Pentecostal woman and invited myself to church with her the next day. That is where I ran face-first into God. When I tried to pray, I couldn’t feel Him. It scared me to think that I may have gone too far from Him and that there was no way for me to feel His presence. But I kept seeking Him and after 3 full hours of prayer and weeping, He came and rescued me. Through His grace and mercy, I was Born Again and haven’t been the same since!
I think it is important for everyone to know that you can’t be homosexual and be born again at the same time. I was so blinded by sin and hungry for God that I had literally surrendered my life before I realized I had. I asked God for His forgiveness and He broke the chains that bound me. He forgave me of my sins and completely delivered me from that awful lifestyle. People I used to be “friends” with no longer know what to say, or how to act in my presence, so they just… don’t come around. I can honestly say that God does change homosexual desires and lifestyles into the natural relationships He created us to have, according to the Bible.
God delivered me, and He WILL deliver you too! God wrapped His loving arms around me just when I thought all was lost. When He died on the cross for me, He died on the cross for you too. He created me in His image and to prosper, not to suffer a lifestyle full of pain and suffering. Please, if you are living this lifestyle, don’t tell me you haven’t or aren’t experiencing pain or suffering, because that is a lie.
I was hungry for the presence God in my life, and being away from that temptation allowed me to finally hear God’s plea. I wasn’t going to stop until He delivered me completely and He did! I have no desire to live in a homosexual lifestyle. God has given me freedom from the bondage of sins that shackled my hands and feet. I am free to dance for Him, to shout for Him, to run for Him. Since turning my life over to Jesus, I have also been delivered from smoking for over 30 years, received deliverance from alcohol, the hurt of my abusers and a life of darkness and homosexuality.
It is a great and wonderful feeling to know that God has already prepared the path that I walk in each and every day. I love Him more than I ever have in this life. My relationship continues to grow each day. I can’t imagine ever living my life any other way.
If you are suffering from or have a loved one whom is living a homosexual lifestyle, don’t give up or give in. People all over this country prayed daily for me, for years. He can and will deliver them or you! Be faithful to Him through prayer, fasting, church and His Word. I know that God gave me grace and mercy and He will give it to you too. Why don’t you let Him today?
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